Monday, October 10, 2011

Is That Really the Attitude You Want to Wear to Dinner? You Might Want To Go Change.

Struggling seems to have been my mental status for most of today.  My attitude was so easily swayed and/or manipulated by the circumstances of the day.  I knew the answer to why I was struggling, but I seemed to ignore it all day until this evening.  Brodie and I prayed together tonight after putting Zachary to bed.  It was a sweet time to talk to our God, thank Him for His many blessings, elevate Him in our hearts as our God and King, ask Him to help us with our heart attitudes, our needs and our struggles. So much peace and confidence in our Maker came into my mind and heart after that prayer.  Why we didn't pray together earlier in the day, I don't know. However, I'm so glad that we did pray together tonight.  What a blessing it is for me to have such a great husband who has a strong desire to honor God with his whole life and a desire to bless me with loving prayer support.

So, back to earlier today. I had felt all day that I shouldn't be having such a struggle with my attitude especially since we just got back yesterday from a weekend long collegiate ministry retreat. (By the way, it was really good time.) The weekend was inspiring and encouraging and an all around good time catching up with friends who live far away on the other side of the state. However, after all that positivity, I still greatly struggled today to think positively.  I titled my blog (a really long title, sorry about that) the way I did because it is what I know someone would want to say to me today if my attitude were an actual piece of clothing. They'd ask, "Is that attitude you're wearing the one you REALLY want to wear to dinner (or insert whatever place I was going today)?  Maybe you should change first."

My loving husband didn't say anything about my attitude today, but that's because I fessed up to him earlier that I was really struggling today and that I felt I could not get out of the "let's be blah all day" attitude I was in.  But it is interesting to recap the day.  All I can say about it really is that it's no fun and also that I know it isn't a very healthy way to live.  It is so tiresome to be prone to negativity all day long.

Yesterday, I was telling Brodie that I am striving to live a life that is seeking truth.....more importantly, seeking God's truth in all aspects of my existence whether that be when I'm talking with my friends about make-up, fashion, cooking, decorating, parenting or keeping up with my toddler.  But still, even in just the day's routine, I need to be seeking what is true, more importantly... truly good, about my circumstances and how do I respond to daily circumstances in a way that is right.  In my opinion the right way is the way that is honoring to God. And seeing that definition reveals that I royally failed at looking for the good in my circumstances today.  Haha! (So glad God's mercies are new every morning.) It's when I put God and others before me and my priorities that I am living right.....right with God and those in my life.

I just remembered in my high school years at Super Summer there was an "I'm Third" award given out to a person from each "school".  The award, as you might already know, was for people who put, Christ first, others second and themselves third.  It's also worded; Jesus, Others, Yourself    J.O.Y.

Funny......J.O.Y. is what we get when we put our priorities in the right order.  There must be something to that when it comes to the things I struggle with recently.  If I make my priority to knowing God more, loving God in all that I do, it should lead me to caring for others more and in a better way.  By doing that I have put my life in the right order.  This is something I need to focus on this week.  I really want joy......J.O.Y.  I know that this way of life works because I have done it many times before. Obviously, I haven't done it too often lately or I wouldn't be blogging about it. HA!  Maybe this struggle of mine was meant to happen so that you too would be encouraged to pursue a life of joy.....J.O.Y.  For me, today, it was difficult to see it becoming a reality because I was in a dense fog of focusing on negative truths instead of positive truths. 

Soon, sometime this week, I would like my attitude to reflect a J.O.Y. pursuit so that someone could say, "I like the grace that you are wearing today".  Or, "that compassion you've got on today is's so YOU!"  Or, "You know, love looks good on you, girl. You should wear it more often. It really brings out your eyes." 

Love you, friends.  Be encouraged as I have been.  God knows we are weak and it's okay because He is strong.  Let us seek to know Him more, bless others around us more and keep ourselves in the "I'm third" position each day. And we will see what great things will happen when we live out J.O.Y.

Colossians 3:12-14
"Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity."

Ah, I needed that. Thank you, Lord.